WRITTEN BY LOOEY Q
Hey, so I was at Super Con, like with a table and stuff! This is an article about some of that stuff that happened while I was there doing that stuff I did.
While I was sitting at my table a lot of people passed by. I had to learn soon the proper amount of time it took to make eye contact with the people walking by as to not freak them out. If I looked at them for too short of time it was like "Oh I'm shy, don't come over here!" and if I looked at them too long it was more like "'SCUSE ME SIR, SPARE SOME CHANGE!" So it had to be that sweet spot where it was like "Oh hey! Wanna, check out my junk?!" Then I think I had a better chance of people coming over and being like "Mmm... Mad Dog eh?...Free comic? Oh this whole book is free!" Then I say "No, the free comic is free, the book is 10 bucks, you touch YOU BUY!" Ok, I didn't say the last part, of course I let everyone take a look at the book! :)
In front of my table was like this mini renaissance festival thing. Well, they kept bringing out this pigmy owl and a falcon! At first I was like, "Ah man, people are gonna totally go there instead of my booth" but then I was like "Hey, can I hold that falcon?" I didn't but, MD got a picture with it!
At these cons, EVERYONE is dressed up in all kinds of crazy and obscure costumes! To the point where if you don't dress up, you're considered one of the weird ones. It's all so wonderful! Looking at all the costumes was pretty dang awesome, like a non stop costume contest 4 days straight!
So one of my "tricks" to get people to come to my table was that I had a bowl of candy on it! You can kind of see it on the bottom of the picture there under Mad Dog's feet. You might think I was bribing kids to come see Mad Dog, but you know what, I totally was! :D For totes I was! But not for the reason you may think! If they came and went with just candy and nothing else, no bigs, because I did it for another schemey reason. To get lots of people to huddle around my table to make everyone else think "Whoa! Whats going on over there! Whoa! A comic? It must be awesome because of all the people there!" And it worked every now and then! Ya gotta do what it takes to get people to check out your stuff, especially when no one has heard of you! Why would they spend 10 bucks on a comic book they probably never heard of when they could spend that on an autograph by the voice of Rita Repulsa?! Well, when you got a good crowd around you, popularity rules all! But that only gets you so far, you also have to have something worth looking at! Thats why I gave away free comic strips! I re-mastered the first page of the Mad Dog comic, printed them and handed them out! They were basically post cards with just the comic on it. Oh! And I learned something on the last day! Wish I thought of this the first day. Which is, I offered to autograph the back of the free comics! Everyone loved it! I would sign it and doodle MD's head and they always thought it was so cool I did it for free. And I bet no one that got a signed free comic threw it away, and they were probably more likely to check out Mad Dog online! At least I hope so!
It was a good thing my lovley wife offered to be there with me the whole time! If not I would have had to hold my wiz for like 9 hours all 4 days! If your a dude or dudette that does comics and wants to get a table, make sure you have someone there with you, you don't want to tickle your undies while trying to sell comics!
So I was giving out free candy, free comic strips and free secret decoder rings (you know, for kids!) but on the last day I had NOTHING left. It was basically a giant green empty table with a 10 dollar comic on it. So I did what any professional comic artist would do....
I started drawing really crappy doodles and marking them at ridiculously high prices! It was fun watching people glance over and look, then make this face like "Oh gosh, the prices here are ridiiiiiculous!"
Well, that was my adventure at Super Con! I'm trying to think of a cool way to end this but I can't so I'll just show you guys this photo instead:
Ok here we go
Why don't ducks carry spare change? They all have "bills"
A man came round in hospital after a serious accident. He shouted," Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor replied," I know you can't, I've cut your arms off".
What is grass' favorite movie?
What's the best time to go to the dentist?
What do sneezes wear on their feet?
What's Mary short for?
She has no legs.
What did the stamp say to the envelope?
I'm stuck on you.
What did one plate say to the other plate?
Lunch is on me!
Luke and Obi-Wan are in a Chinese restaurant having a meal.
Obi-Wan is deftly manipulating his chopsticks with the ease you'd expect from a Jedi Master.
Anyway, poor old Luke is having a nightmare, using his chop-sticks in both hands, dropping his food all over the table and eventually himself.
Obi-Wan looks at Luke disapprovingly and says,
"Use the FORKS, Luke."
why do seagulls fly over the sea
because if they flew over the bay theyd be BAYGELS
I like my children like I like my wine, locked up in the cellar.
WHAT DID THE OX SAY TO HER SON WHEN HE LEFT FOR SCHOOL?
what do you clean a tuba with?
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
Because he had no guts
Two atoms were walking when one of the atoms turns to his friend and says "I think I lost an electron!"
His friend asks "Are you sure?"
Why did the car go to McDonalds?
It was out of cheeseburgers.
So Sylvester Stalone, Jackie Chan, and Arnold Schwarzenegger decide to make a movie about classical musicians. But they all had to pick a part so Sly goes first and says he wants to be Handel because thats his favorite, Jackie goes next and says he wants to be Mozart because he kicks ass. Then Arnold said, "I'll be Bach"
Why couldn't the gentlemenly pirate sire get into the sophisticatedly adult content movie?
It was generously rated ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
What do you find in the woods that is brown and sticky?
two peanuts were walking down the street, and were assaulted.
they had it coming.
how do you make a tissue dance?
put a little boogie in it.
What do women and airoplanes have in common?
They both have cockpits
why do they call it an xbox 360?
cause when you see it you'll turn 360 degrees and walk away
An Anteater walks into a bar.
The bartender asks hime is he wants a beer, and the anteater responds, "Nooooooooooooooooooooo.."
The bartender says, "Okay, would you like a water?"
Finally, the bartender says, "Hey buddy, what's with the long nose?"
You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish!
What kinda cheese doesn't belong to you?
What is "pi"?
Mathematician: Pi is the ratio of the circumference of a circle to its diameter.
Engineer: Pi is about 22/over 9000.
Physicist: Pi is 3.14159 plus or minus 0.000005
Computer Programmer: Pi is 3.141592653589 in double precision.
Nutritionist: You one track math-minded fellows, Pie is a healthy and delicious dessert!
How many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
What do you call two mexicans playing basketball against each other?
Juan on Juan.
Why don't oysters give to charity?
Because they're shellfish!
Oh God... that was good stuff...
Welcome to my world. I'd like to introduce you to Ollieville, a town where my comic pals live. Mad Dog and Spot, two best friends that like to hang out and go on adventures are currently residents. More towns-folks will be arriving over time (new web comics) Hope you enjoy your stay here. Don't forget to drop by Grubby's for a saucewich burger. Ask for extra sauce, only 29 cents.